Reasons Kingdom of the Crystal Skull Screwed Up Indiana Jones. In case youve been living in a cave or exploring an ancient tomb for the past week, you should know that Disney has announced that theres to be a new Indiana Jones film released in 2. With a new Indiana Jones adventure in the pipeline, its time to look back at what went wrong with his last outing, Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. Can You Purchase Garcinia Cambogia At Walmart How To Detox My Liver And Gallbladder How To Detox From Crack Cocaine At Home Detox Smoothies With Less Sugar Cleanse. Steven Spielberg and once again starring Harrison Ford. The news was met with a mixture of reactions, some incredibly excited that Harrison Ford is dusting off the hat and the whip again and others more cautious with the wounds of Kingdom of the Crystal Skull opening anew. Will Indiana Jones 5 be the Indy adventure we all hope it will be Only time will tell, but it could do a lot worse than avoiding the pitfalls Crystal Skull fell into and reading our 1. Crystal Impact Match 2 Cracker' title='Crystal Impact Match 2 Cracker' />Reasons Kingdom of the Crystal Skull Screwed Up Indiana Jones. Undid a great ending. Raiders of the Lost Ark came out, George Lucas and Steven Spielberg decided to send the beloved character of Indiana Jones on his last crusade. The film dealt with Indys father issues as well as the quest for the Holy Grail. By the end of the film, the Grail has been found, Indy had reconnected with his father and our heroes galloped off into the sunset, like the classic cowboys of old. The final shot was a perfect way to close the book on the adventures of Henry Jones Jr. Kingdom of the Crystal Skull doesnt do enough to justify reopening that book. We can only start to reflect on how good a story was once its over. Last Crusade was the perfect end point for the character, having our hero work out his family issues and have achieved the literal Holy Grail of his career. The end point of Kingdom of the Crystal Skull has Indy getting married and presumably settling down. Heres hoping Indy 5 has a better conclusion that that. Convoluted plot. Indiana Jones films are pretty simple chase affairs. Indy is told of a powerful ancient relic, finds out that some bad dudes want to get their hands on said relic and then he endeavours to stop them and make sure that the power doesnt fall into the wrong hands. Crystal Impact Match 2 Crack' title='Crystal Impact Match 2 Crack' />On paper, Kingdom of the Crystal Skull follows that formula. However, the film weighs itself down with needless story baggage. For example, there is no point to the FBI subplot whatsoever. Indy gets hauled in by government agents who suspect him of being a Communist the film being set at the height of the Mc. Carthy era witch hunts. They also ransack his office and cause Jim Broadbents Dean to resign from his post. Once the film gets underway, the FBI are forgotten about. At the end, Dean Stanforth seems to still be working at Marshall College having hired Indy as the associate dean and everythings back to normal. There are numerous bits like this that distract from the main narrative and make the story baggy. No interesting villains. Theres a popular saying that a film is only as good as its villain. While not necessarily true in all cases, it certainly applies to the previous Indy films. Belloq and Major Toht headed up Raiders of the Lost Ark, Mola Ram was Temple of Dooms baddie and both Walter Donovan and Elsa Schneider shared evil duties in Last Crusade. These are all memorable villains with clear motivations and reasons for us to hate them. Kingdom of the Crystal Skull has Irina Spalko, a highly decorated Soviet scientist and military officer, obsessed with using the power of the crystal skull to aid the Soviet Union win the Cold War. There isnt much about her thats particularly villainous or charismatic. Crystal Impact Match 2 CrackersWith unmatched integrity and professionalism, Pensions Investments consistently delivers news, research and analysis to the executives who manage the flow of funds. Daily paper. Local, state, and wire news and commentary. Photo galleries, business and obituaries. The Power Crystal trope as used in popular culture. Diamonds are a Magical Girls best friend. They are also friends to Mons, Doomsday Devices, space rangers. The overall plan is vague too. There are mentions of brainwashing, but its not expanded on enough. We know that the skull has weird powers and sent John Hurts Oxley crazy, but were never given any real indication of the consequences of the skull falling into Soviet hands. Its hard to get invested in Indy preventing disaster when we dont really know what that disaster would be. Its also tough to cheer a hero besting a bad guy you dont care about. Underwhelming action. Big action set pieces are a hallmark of the Indy series. For decades, audiences have come to known the franchise as a place for globetrotting, adventure and death defying feats. The giant boulder rolling after Indy at the beginning of Raiders of the Lost Ark is an iconic moment of cinema and a pop cultural touchstone. With all that in mind, its baffling that Kingdom of the Crystal Skull has weak, run of the mill action. Apart from a half decent bike chase around the college campus, the action is mediocre, soulless and CGI heavy. Theres a chase through the Peruvian jungle that has all the danger and tension drained thanks to weak CGI work. Mutt swordfighting Spalko astride two speeding vehicles is ridiculous, but could have been fun. However, the scene is so obviously computer generated youre made very much aware that it was shot on a soundstage, ruining the immersion completely. The earlier Indy films were triumphs of classic stuntwork and its disheartening to see Crystal Skull move so far away from that. Lack of gritdarkness. The Indy franchise has never shied away from the darker side of things. From the melting heads in Raiders to nearly everything about Temple of Doom and Donovans demise in Last Crusade, there are some gruesome and disturbing things contained within the first three films. Put simply, Kingdom of the Crystal Skull plays it too safe. It feels like a concession to being family friendly, which is something the series never really was. To make everything practically edgeless distances the series from its pulp roots, not to mention the other films in the series. People are shot off camera, theres little to no focus on injury and most of the deaths are cartoony and over the top. Even the themes are less mature. Raiders was an exploration of faith, greed and even had some Promethean parallels. Crystal Skull is just a wacky adventure with no real subtext. It all feels toothless and unworthy of the Indiana Jones title. Over reliance on CGISince the 1. CGI has become an increasingly big part of how blockbusters deliver huge spectacle and action. As with any tool, its up to the craftsman to know how to use it and the limitations of it. Some of the best computer generated work in more modern films goes unnoticed because thats exactly what its designed to do. When it comes to effects, there are some filmmakers that tend to use a sledgehammer when a chisel would have sufficed. Unfortunately Crystal Skull suffers from the sledgehammer approach. The human eye is great at detecting fakery and Indy 4 is lousy with it. Entire locations are greenscreened and action sequences have an unpleasant blurry quality to them because either the effects work or technology wasnt up to scratch. To be fair, the older films used miniatures and matte paintings to the same end, but they were used sparingly. Locations and stunts were kept as real as possible and as a result, they still hold up today. Crystal Skull has managed to age badly in eight years. Watered down mystery solving. Indiana Jones is an archaeologist. Hes a learned man with both a knowledge of and a respect for the past. Its these things that make him successful in his career. Hes also tough and more than capable in a fight, but his brawn is always secondary to his brains. Part of the fun of the films is watching Indy figure out some historical puzzle. He works out the correct burial site of the Ark of the Covenant in Raiders and solves many mysteries his father couldnt in Last Crusade. Kingdom of the Crystal Skull has Indy deciphering notes left by Oxley. Slotless. These wondrous items do not adhere to a specific slot, and are often carried by a character in a way similar to a potion or wand, worn on some part of the body that doesnt correspond to an item slot, or are otherwise utilized in a particular way detailed in the items description. Slotless wondrous items range through the gamut of appearances and functions, and, generally, if a magic item doesnt fit into any other category it appears here. Anyone can use slotless wondrous items unless specified otherwise by its description. These wondrous items are usually use activated or triggered by a command word, but details vary from item to item. Slotless Wondrous ItemsdLeast Minor Slotless Item. Price. 01. Feather token anchor5. Universal solvent. Ioun torch. 75 gp. Stubborn nail. 10. War paint of the terrible visage. Elixir of love. 15. Unguent of timelessness. Feather token fan2. Formula alembic. 20. 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